I am enjoying writing again, as always when I start something I go through phases. This has been common for me throughout and has helped me creatively a lot of times as well but has also been a bit of a curse if I leave it midway through. Okay back to the part of the phase:
1. New Passion (Yay!) When I enjoy an activity I plan to do it every day, like when I started illustrating I wanted to continue it every single day. Or write now it is writing so I want to do that every day. I search for paintings, I save pins of art, I research artists, buy products which have the form of art I love, download games which have drawing activity in it etc. I become obsessive about it and immerse myself in it completely.
2. Continuity: Now this is tricky, if I get past this I will continue the passion and if not I just leave it like a hot potato. It's like when you give a child some new toy, they play with it obsessively and always carry it around and they have had enough of it and move on to the next one. For me this happens with my various interests. Currently I love writing, illustrating and baking. But which would survive this phase is hard to say.
3. Productivity: Now if I survive the previous two phases I get to this one, in which I actually start the idea generation, I see potential and a gap and I try to fill it creatively. This phase I thoroughly enjoy, its very satisfying. Like recently I made books on folk art and our culture. After this phase the enthusiasm does not die down, I will always further it a bit more. But getting here is pretty tough for me.
Now coming back to my post, I felt like talking about siblings, yes those irritating creatures god got them to your life just to irritate the hell out of you! Actually with our siblings our relationship keeps changing. It is a wonderful journey that you take together. So I see it divided into parts.
Part 1 - Younger days/school/ uni days
Like I said, I came from a joint family and we were five of us growing up and not to mention our numerous cousins who kept visiting time to time. The concept of private space was quite lost on all of us. We always had to share things, be it room or toys or games etc. So there was bound to be differences and fights. Also where you are in your sibling hierarchy was also important, like if you are the eldest then you had minions to do your work but if you are the youngest you were pampered a lot. I was unfortunately the middle one, along with my other brother S. So we got the most of the scolding thrown our way. But in this part your sibling is your partner in crime or your friend to throw under the bus. Like when we wanted any permission for movies or chips we would send our youngest siblings Arjun or Adu to do the talking.
My elder sister would be really ahead of us in everything plotting and planning, really it was next to impossible to catch her in any of her acts and believe me we have tried. She can get out of the stickiest situations quite easily. So the equation between us siblings was of loggerheads, pranks and a lot of teasing. But we always had a company to play with, that was an upside, we played all sorts of games together.
Part 2 - Staying in hostel/different city/job/or MARRIAGE
Now the equation changes, when we are young we seldom think that we are not always going to be together 24/7, there is going to come a time that we all go our separate ways, I think it is then that the reality sinks in. We suddenly forget the fights and getting on the nerves part. We miss our squabbles but sometimes hate to admit it. This is a difficult or different phase. But contrary to our belief that our sibling will forget us when away, we tend to miss them more. The bond becomes stronger somehow. and with us growing up, the fights are less. Now they become the best friends, whom you call to discuss if you go through a tough time. Because let's face it, who knows us better than them. You end up calling them often and looking forward to their visit and then feeling sad that it went off so quickly. This is when you realize that you were in so much hurry to grow up that looking back childhood was the best part.
Part 3- Growing old not apart
When I see my parents and grandparents with their siblings, I hear their stories while growing up, the pranks that they played at a time or got someone in trouble all become delicious memories. So then I reflect that the luxury of meeting often that they had earlier is not the same, there are health issues, family issues, etc, etc and the few moments of the union during important family functions are often the highlight of the life lived together. This sometimes takes an effort for the next generation to make sure that it is possible like my father always made sure till my grandmother was alive and her mobility was there, he took her to meet her siblings or made sure that they come and visit her. This at the time of my growing up, did not look like a big thing to me, but now I feel that it is something to be cherished, since time sadly does not return.
Of course this is looking to be a rather long and serious post but everyone has a very unique relationship with their sibling, some may not get along or some are privileged to stay with their siblings throughout their lives like my father and his brother or my husband and his brother. Some are broken by their ego or clashes and some are best of friends, Which one are you?
I do miss all my siblings and I know they do too but do not admit it. And somehow when you are with them, you return to your childhood no matter how old you are. So a big shout out to all of you, you are blessed if you have a sibling that you adore and who adores you back, cherish that because not all are as lucky as you
1. New Passion (Yay!) When I enjoy an activity I plan to do it every day, like when I started illustrating I wanted to continue it every single day. Or write now it is writing so I want to do that every day. I search for paintings, I save pins of art, I research artists, buy products which have the form of art I love, download games which have drawing activity in it etc. I become obsessive about it and immerse myself in it completely.
2. Continuity: Now this is tricky, if I get past this I will continue the passion and if not I just leave it like a hot potato. It's like when you give a child some new toy, they play with it obsessively and always carry it around and they have had enough of it and move on to the next one. For me this happens with my various interests. Currently I love writing, illustrating and baking. But which would survive this phase is hard to say.
3. Productivity: Now if I survive the previous two phases I get to this one, in which I actually start the idea generation, I see potential and a gap and I try to fill it creatively. This phase I thoroughly enjoy, its very satisfying. Like recently I made books on folk art and our culture. After this phase the enthusiasm does not die down, I will always further it a bit more. But getting here is pretty tough for me.
Now coming back to my post, I felt like talking about siblings, yes those irritating creatures god got them to your life just to irritate the hell out of you! Actually with our siblings our relationship keeps changing. It is a wonderful journey that you take together. So I see it divided into parts.
Part 1 - Younger days/school/ uni days
Like I said, I came from a joint family and we were five of us growing up and not to mention our numerous cousins who kept visiting time to time. The concept of private space was quite lost on all of us. We always had to share things, be it room or toys or games etc. So there was bound to be differences and fights. Also where you are in your sibling hierarchy was also important, like if you are the eldest then you had minions to do your work but if you are the youngest you were pampered a lot. I was unfortunately the middle one, along with my other brother S. So we got the most of the scolding thrown our way. But in this part your sibling is your partner in crime or your friend to throw under the bus. Like when we wanted any permission for movies or chips we would send our youngest siblings Arjun or Adu to do the talking.
My elder sister would be really ahead of us in everything plotting and planning, really it was next to impossible to catch her in any of her acts and believe me we have tried. She can get out of the stickiest situations quite easily. So the equation between us siblings was of loggerheads, pranks and a lot of teasing. But we always had a company to play with, that was an upside, we played all sorts of games together.
Part 2 - Staying in hostel/different city/job/or MARRIAGE
Now the equation changes, when we are young we seldom think that we are not always going to be together 24/7, there is going to come a time that we all go our separate ways, I think it is then that the reality sinks in. We suddenly forget the fights and getting on the nerves part. We miss our squabbles but sometimes hate to admit it. This is a difficult or different phase. But contrary to our belief that our sibling will forget us when away, we tend to miss them more. The bond becomes stronger somehow. and with us growing up, the fights are less. Now they become the best friends, whom you call to discuss if you go through a tough time. Because let's face it, who knows us better than them. You end up calling them often and looking forward to their visit and then feeling sad that it went off so quickly. This is when you realize that you were in so much hurry to grow up that looking back childhood was the best part.
Part 3- Growing old not apart
When I see my parents and grandparents with their siblings, I hear their stories while growing up, the pranks that they played at a time or got someone in trouble all become delicious memories. So then I reflect that the luxury of meeting often that they had earlier is not the same, there are health issues, family issues, etc, etc and the few moments of the union during important family functions are often the highlight of the life lived together. This sometimes takes an effort for the next generation to make sure that it is possible like my father always made sure till my grandmother was alive and her mobility was there, he took her to meet her siblings or made sure that they come and visit her. This at the time of my growing up, did not look like a big thing to me, but now I feel that it is something to be cherished, since time sadly does not return.
Of course this is looking to be a rather long and serious post but everyone has a very unique relationship with their sibling, some may not get along or some are privileged to stay with their siblings throughout their lives like my father and his brother or my husband and his brother. Some are broken by their ego or clashes and some are best of friends, Which one are you?
I do miss all my siblings and I know they do too but do not admit it. And somehow when you are with them, you return to your childhood no matter how old you are. So a big shout out to all of you, you are blessed if you have a sibling that you adore and who adores you back, cherish that because not all are as lucky as you
Wow beautifully written yes we all love our siblings as the saying goes blood is thicker than water but I love my co sister as my own our bond is very strong
ReplyDeleteAnanditha dear. Very good expression of thoughts as the crow flies by and the clouds move around about siblings. Blessed are the ones who live in a joint family to have a crowd of siblings to enjoy and cherish the golden moments and pass belated judgements on how things should have probably turned out at a particular instance. More often than not the instigator wins with a wry smile on the losers face!
ReplyDeleteWe are a blessed lot since our parents, grandparents and great grandparents came with an extended family more than what we can imagine now. The trick is in their upbringing of the numerous kids with their untoward attention and affection. Without any seeming intervention apart from occasional gestures and action they ensured a normal growing up of their children. They also ensured several interaction between the cousins and evolved a situation where everyone got to know everyone else in the family.
Probably everyone read the Three Musketeers. All for one and one for all was their motive and they succeeded brilliantly.
So here goes the musings from a sibling with lots of love and good wishes for you and all others from the younger lot with a request to hold tight amongst yourselves to face situations the wonderful thing called life has to offer. (Of course maintaining the 2 metres distance!)